The Red Queen from Alice in Wonderland liked to think of at least 6 Impossible Things before breakfast. Think that going plastic-free is impossible? No way man, its IMPOSSIBLY EASY. Here are 6 Impossibly Easy things you can do, right now, every day, to reduce your plastic use.
1. Don’t buy drinks in plastic bottles. I have been known to forgo a much-craved Coca-Cola in favour of say, a juice, using this method. This is why plastic is not only bad for our planet, it’s bad for your own health. This is fact. Alas, except for the invention of the can. Oh boy, that Coke in a can is a pal-o-mine. I love you canned Coke. You are sweet and frothy and sometimes make my eyes water if I slam your contents down too fast. I don’t wanna hear nobody sassing about how it rots your guts and cleans metal and dissolves severed fingers. I’m giving up plastic man, allow me this one simple pleasure. Sorry juice.
2. Do not accept plastic bags. Under any circumstances. Configure a makeshift tarp out of your t-shirt and wrap it all in that. Push your children in a pram and put your stuff in that. If you have no children, go the granny trolley. Buy those bloody canvas bags they peddle at just about every shop, and when you begrudge buying ANOTHER canvas bag because you forgot yours AGAIN, well now let that be a lesson to ya. Stuff those bags to overflowing if you didn’t bring enough bags, and lug those home, and skip the gym session.
3. Eat KFC instead of McDonalds. Buy the box set 2-piece feed and a canned drink. This is the only safe drive-through fast food. Trust me, I’ve tested it. Don’t even think about requesting no straw through a drive through speaker box, who knows what you’ll end up with besides a quizzical stare from the drive-through person. Eat your ice cream from a cone rather than a cup. Buy the block of Cadbury’s because it’s in a cardboard packet rather than the Mars bar. There is always an alternative.
4. Pack your own cutlery and straw. Come on ladies, like you don’t have room in your overly voluminous handbag for these guys. This is one of the reasons why its actually so easy to be a plastic-free Mama – you’re already toting all that crap as it is.
5. Eat in. Take your time. Smell the roses. Taste your food. Be late for work because you’re chilling in the coffee shop rather than grabbing a quickie take away. Go slow. Just please try not to lose your job.
6. Avoid being sold on conveniences. This takes on many forms. Buy a tub of yoghurt rather than 4 individual containers. Get a big bag of chips instead of the snack sizes. Buy a big bottle of your shampoo and squeeze it into recycled mini-bottles, keep a mini-bottle in the shower so that the big plastic one doesn’t take up too much space. All a bit too inconvenient for you? Well it may be said that all that plastic really is rather inconvenient to our planet. This is not hard to do, and it saves you moolah as well.
Oh gosh, I have learned so many other things you can do as well. And it’s easy!